Hiatus

Spent three days "living" with my mother as she was having some health issues (chest pain - indigestion NOT heart, insomnia, etc.). Doctor started her on anti-anxiety meds and something for acid/reflux. I wanted to be close to see how she handled the new meds. A bit of an up-and-down week, but she seems to have finally settled so I felt quite safe about heading home. Hope to find some more care for her, especially someone who can be with her overnight or live-in for night shifts, so she has 'round the clock care for the time being. Health authorities maintain that she is getting best care possible where she is, and is far to "with it" to last long in complex care - she isn't independent enough to go into assisted living. So search is on for appropriate help at her home. At present, my biggest concern is that Momzy be happy and safe if not safe and happy.

And, yes, that is more of a concern than anything happening in my own little world right now.

The truth of my medical situation is starting to take on a whole new reality. This really hit home a couple of weeks back when my oncologist told me I'm off the latest drug study. Yes, I am more than a little bummed by the news. Have a message in to my psychiatrist asking his thoughts re increasing the dose of my anti-depressants (he will be back from holidays on Dec 15 - I can wait as I don't believe I'm in crisis or anything like that). Have also tried to tie up some loose ends re getting a power of attorney, completing a BC Ministry of Health Services "No Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation" form (aka a Do Not Resuscitate or DNR form). Have also met with Clarence, my priest, re my "going away party" plans. Just getting all these arrangements made has given much peace of mind. Would hate to think of leaving loved ones with the task of sorting out all of this crap. Besides, someone has to ensure that Rock of Ages, In the Garden, Amazing Grace and several other all-time funeral hits aren't included in the play list at my little affair!! Do hope anyone crazy enough to attend the festivities remembers how much I loath that insipid "breast cancer pink"! But before we go too far down that road, there is much to be happy about in the foreseeable future.

Yes, I am off the latest study due to further spread of the cancer. There are now more lesions throughout my lungs and trachea. Have also heard for the first time that lesions also appear between my lungs. No wonder I've been wheezing! Have a Ventalin inhaler now, and that helps a great deal. Good news #1.

And there appears to be no sign of spread to any other organ, so that's very good news indeed. Good news #2.

On top of that, the reported spread isn't quite as dramatic as it sounds. The disease is still advancing at a controlled pace. And while there are no further "targeted" drugs available at this time, there is another chemo drug that might help continue the slowed progression of the disease. Good news #3. (Don't ya just love how good news comes in threes?)

With Christmas coming in a few short days, and a planned trip to Japan in January, I've been given permission to post-pone this new treatment until mid or late January 2012. So, like all stars of stage, screen, and cyberspace, I'm on hiatus. In my mind, this is the best news yet to come from my oncologist's report. Hey, if this is to be my last Christmas, I don't want any side effects from a new medication to spoil my fun - or interfere with the enjoyment of a full-on turkey dinner! My oncologist doubts delaying the start of treatment will make much difference, so I have her blessing. Bonus: I can have the treatment at St Mary's so won't have the drain of a ferry ride on top of everything else. That, in a nutshell, is my news. And it's pretty good news on the whole, me thinks.

All this means there is still time to cross another thing off my bucket list - perhaps learning to sing on key (won't friends and family celebrating a birthday in 2012 be looking forward to that day).  Might even squeeze in a brief fencing lesson! Woohoo, baby! Let the good times continue to roll!