Ah, the best laid plans of mice, men, and the woman who has not yet felt the full force of her first chemo treatment.
Suffice it to say that much of Saturday's plans remain as such. I had felt a tad off when first waking up, but given my energy level at the time thought it of little consequence. By noon, however, that energy was flagging mightily and I knew, from past experience, that the chemo side effects were starting to kick in. Thankfully, I had completed the majority of my necessary chores but, sadly, had yet to start any of the fun activities I had planned for the day. No matter. I snuggled down into my cozy bed at about 4pm and awoke somewhat dazed at 2pm the following day (Sunday). (Yes, I did wake up for the obligatory trips to the washroom, for a small snack and drink of water, but since this is an all-ages-access blog, I thought it best not to mention the fiddly bits.) So much for attending church! I've learned that there will be a short meditation-focused service on Weds, and if my treatments finish in time I may well start attending those sessions as it appears mid-Sat to mid-Sun will be the tougher times during the weekly chemo cycle.
Last time I was on chemo I had about 24-48hrs of feeling good/okay followed by 24-48hr of flu-like symptoms which wound down to a general blah feeling before that morphed into something nearing normalcy. And then I'd be back having my next chemo and the cycle would begin again. Those flu-like symptoms aren't quite flu-like, but that is the easiest way to describe them. Perhaps it is more like the sensation I get just before the typical flu symptoms - joint aches, stomach upset, fever - set in. The headache, on the other hand, is very much present. The worse thing I've tried to do is rally against all this. The best thing? Take a Tylenol and go to bed.
Sleep is a wonderful healer. I trust my body enough to let it tell me what it needs and when it needs it. The approach has allowed me more time and energy to play in the garden and do other things around the house, read, sort through email, etc. than if I took the alternative approach. That's when I would, inevitably, pull a muscle or get terribly short of breath. Now that I'm a "woman of leisure", I can afford to take things at a more leisurely pace. At least it works for me.
Still had a bit of the fatigue and general blah stuff today. At least most of the headache has passed. Puttered in the garden, went to the bank, popped in on Jon for some gardening advice, and laid down for a five-hour "nap". Hope to have enough energy this week to enjoy some time with cousin Donna and her husband Hans (from New Brunswick) who are stopping in to see Mom after visiting other relatives on Vancouver Island. They are scheduled to arrive on Wed, my next chemo day.
Night is falling. Bed is calling again. Given the amount of sleep in my near future, I am warmed by this late philosopher's thoughts:
Sleep is the interest we have to pay on the capital which
is called in at death; and the higher the rate of interest and the more
regularly it is paid, the further the date of redemption is postponed.
~Arthur Schopenhauer
Of course, the concept of sleep always sounds more inviting when expressed by a poetic soul:
Then, the cool kindliness of sheets, that soon
Smooth away trouble; and the rough male kiss
Of blankets.... ~Rupert Brooke
This, however, might be the most accurate description of my new time-consuming past-time (although I'll leave the counting to Mrs. Sarkozy):
Sleep is perverse as human nature,
Sleep is perverse as legislature....
So people who go to bed to sleep
Must count French premiers or sheep,
And people who ought to arise from bed
Yawn and go back to sleep instead. ~Ogden Nash
'Nite nite.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Sleepy Saturday
My garden will certainly appreciate today's rain. The change in the weather will also inspire me to "cocoon" a bit. Will make the weekly trek to the local farmer's market and do a few other chores, but intend to spend the rest of the day doing something creative. May do some weaving or knitting or get to one of the dozens of UFOs (unfinished objects) that have been sitting in my sewing/craft room for days/weeks/years/since the last millennium. So much inspiration (my baby shoes, high school reunion pin, 2nd prize ribbon for the nearby drawing done at age 7, story written in 1965 with accompanying drawing, photo of me and studio mates that ran in the Georgia Straight, poem written by a friend, yarn I've died, rhubarb parchment I made, inspiring words heard/read, beautiful postcards - some of artwork by friends, and other bric-a-brac that covers wall above sewing desk ...), so little time. What inspires you?
Friday, April 16, 2010
I'll drink to that
I have long mused that I was born into the wrong century or era. What century or era was the more appropriate is up for debate, but after thumbing through my 1868 (the 2nd) edition of The Philosophy of Eating by Albert J. Bellows, MD (a "late" professor of Chemistry, Physiology, and Hygiene), I have concluded that the Victorian era would be a fine place to land. The good doctor concluded, in a chapter titled "Diet in Sickness", that the diet provided in hospitals should be as follows. For the sake of simplicity/editing for length, I will only include the breakfast portioned out at a few hospitals.
St. Thomas's Hospital of London
Full diet: 2 pints beer, 14 oz bread, water gruel
Dry diet: 14 oz. bread, 2 pints of beer, water gruel
Milk diet: 12 oz. bread, 1 pint of milk
Fever diet: 12 oz bread, 2 pints of beer
London Hospital
Common diet: 12 oz bread, 1 pint porter men, 1/2 pint porter women, gruel
Middle diet: Same as common.
Low diet: 8 oz bread, gruel
Milk diet: 12 oz bread, gruel
All three hospitals above have, when ordered by the physician, given boiled mutton to those on the full diet "in addition, chops, steaks, fish, wine, spirits, porter, etc."
At Westminster Hospital, so-called incurables were given 3/4 lb bread, 1/2 lb meat, 1/2 lb potatoes, 1/4 pint milk, and 1/4 pint porter daily.
Only Middlesex Hospital listed a cancer diet which consisted of 12 oz bread, 1/2 lb meat, 1/2 lb potatoes, 1 pint milk daily.
I note with more than a passing interest in the mention of "shells" being served at breakfast and supper at Boston City Hospital.
Do not for a minute think that I am advocating an alcoholic diet. Far from it, although I do enjoy a tipple of good wine now and then. However, my current malady has me less interested in wine and more interested in experimenting with a vegetarian + seafood diet. My appreciation for the finer things in the culinary world has not been curtailed, however. For example, as I type I am sipping on a lovely Vignette Wine Country Soda which is all natural and non-alcoholic. The key ingredient is Chardonnay grape juice concentrate. At 100 calories per 12 oz bottle, it is a nice treat. It is also nice diluted with a bit of sparkling water, cranberry juice, or both. Picked up a four-pack at a shop called Homewerx on Davie St between Burrard and Thurlow. Cost was under $12.
So you see, I'm doing okay. Haven't entirely given up the things I enjoy. And I'm feeling much better today than yesterday, and most certainly better than after treatment on Wed (I believe much of the credit goes to Wendy and her excellent treatment yesterday). Heck, felt good enough that I did some gardening today. Nice way to enjoy the sun.
St. Thomas's Hospital of London
Full diet: 2 pints beer, 14 oz bread, water gruel
Dry diet: 14 oz. bread, 2 pints of beer, water gruel
Milk diet: 12 oz. bread, 1 pint of milk
Fever diet: 12 oz bread, 2 pints of beer
London Hospital
Common diet: 12 oz bread, 1 pint porter men, 1/2 pint porter women, gruel
Middle diet: Same as common.
Low diet: 8 oz bread, gruel
Milk diet: 12 oz bread, gruel
All three hospitals above have, when ordered by the physician, given boiled mutton to those on the full diet "in addition, chops, steaks, fish, wine, spirits, porter, etc."
At Westminster Hospital, so-called incurables were given 3/4 lb bread, 1/2 lb meat, 1/2 lb potatoes, 1/4 pint milk, and 1/4 pint porter daily.
Only Middlesex Hospital listed a cancer diet which consisted of 12 oz bread, 1/2 lb meat, 1/2 lb potatoes, 1 pint milk daily.
I note with more than a passing interest in the mention of "shells" being served at breakfast and supper at Boston City Hospital.
Do not for a minute think that I am advocating an alcoholic diet. Far from it, although I do enjoy a tipple of good wine now and then. However, my current malady has me less interested in wine and more interested in experimenting with a vegetarian + seafood diet. My appreciation for the finer things in the culinary world has not been curtailed, however. For example, as I type I am sipping on a lovely Vignette Wine Country Soda which is all natural and non-alcoholic. The key ingredient is Chardonnay grape juice concentrate. At 100 calories per 12 oz bottle, it is a nice treat. It is also nice diluted with a bit of sparkling water, cranberry juice, or both. Picked up a four-pack at a shop called Homewerx on Davie St between Burrard and Thurlow. Cost was under $12.
So you see, I'm doing okay. Haven't entirely given up the things I enjoy. And I'm feeling much better today than yesterday, and most certainly better than after treatment on Wed (I believe much of the credit goes to Wendy and her excellent treatment yesterday). Heck, felt good enough that I did some gardening today. Nice way to enjoy the sun.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Cath won't party
There I was, skipping into St. Mary's Hospital with my spiffy new Bard Power Port. I had the world by the tail, and was kinda looking forward to getting the chemo stuff underway after a month of waiting. Yesterday's weigh in and blood test had gone well, and the results of last week's MUGA scan were also favourable. The staff on the Ambulatory Care Unit were their usual pleasant selves - we chatted about knitting (a conversation initiated by the mitten project I brought along and a book called "Knit Two" that another patient was reading). The sun was out. I was basking in the lingering scent of the blossoms on the meyer lemon tree that I bought yesterday.
I took a minute to get reacquainted with my ol' pal IV. She is looking as tall and slim atop her shiny new pole, and I knew her constant purring would provide a soothing backdrop to the treatment time. Even though I didn't have any Emla cream to apply to the port before the nurse inserted the catheter, the "pin prick" was of little consequence and the line seemed happily engaged. That is until Cath Bard Port decided to stop playing.
My first clue that something was amiss came about 5 minutes after the chemo drip was started. There was noticeable swelling around the port site, and the surrounding area was warm. IV hadn't bothered to notify anyone as the drip kept going but the drug was going to the tissue rather than through the vein. Despite the valiant efforts of two nurses, four subsequent attempts to get a new line working through the port failed to produce a favourable results. Ghosts of treatments past! (This is what happened just before it was decided that the port used during my chemo treatments of two years ago was no longer functioning and had to be removed.) The nurses then tried the two most likely veins in my forearm. Neither vein would allow the line to thread - it was thought that vein valves were blocking the route. In the end, the vein on the inside of my elbow, the one commonly used for blood tests was used. IV spent the remainder of the session purring away while Cath went into bruise recovery mode. Only thing worse than all of this was the "food" presented to me at lunch time - everyone in the treatment room (including a fellow who was in for diabetes treatment not chemo) voted the chocolate brownie the best thing on the tray. Nobody ate much of the macaroni/ground beef whatever it was, and the finely diced turnip was too cold to be consumed even if I had wanted it.
Looking forward to a visit from Wendy Humphreys-Tubbet tomorrow. She will be giving me "specialized kinesiology" sessions to help me better deal with the side effects of the chemo and to help my body better accept the drug. I'll also be hearing from a consultant at Vancouver Coastal Health who is setting up home care for my mother - and will be helping arrange the same for me.
Have a craving for a roasted soy nut butter and marmalade sandwich (marmalade is made by Jon - he adds a generous bit of Scotch to the batch. YUM!) and then back to bed. I'm sure I will feel much better after I've had a decent nap. Or two.
I took a minute to get reacquainted with my ol' pal IV. She is looking as tall and slim atop her shiny new pole, and I knew her constant purring would provide a soothing backdrop to the treatment time. Even though I didn't have any Emla cream to apply to the port before the nurse inserted the catheter, the "pin prick" was of little consequence and the line seemed happily engaged. That is until Cath Bard Port decided to stop playing.
My first clue that something was amiss came about 5 minutes after the chemo drip was started. There was noticeable swelling around the port site, and the surrounding area was warm. IV hadn't bothered to notify anyone as the drip kept going but the drug was going to the tissue rather than through the vein. Despite the valiant efforts of two nurses, four subsequent attempts to get a new line working through the port failed to produce a favourable results. Ghosts of treatments past! (This is what happened just before it was decided that the port used during my chemo treatments of two years ago was no longer functioning and had to be removed.) The nurses then tried the two most likely veins in my forearm. Neither vein would allow the line to thread - it was thought that vein valves were blocking the route. In the end, the vein on the inside of my elbow, the one commonly used for blood tests was used. IV spent the remainder of the session purring away while Cath went into bruise recovery mode. Only thing worse than all of this was the "food" presented to me at lunch time - everyone in the treatment room (including a fellow who was in for diabetes treatment not chemo) voted the chocolate brownie the best thing on the tray. Nobody ate much of the macaroni/ground beef whatever it was, and the finely diced turnip was too cold to be consumed even if I had wanted it.
Looking forward to a visit from Wendy Humphreys-Tubbet tomorrow. She will be giving me "specialized kinesiology" sessions to help me better deal with the side effects of the chemo and to help my body better accept the drug. I'll also be hearing from a consultant at Vancouver Coastal Health who is setting up home care for my mother - and will be helping arrange the same for me.
Have a craving for a roasted soy nut butter and marmalade sandwich (marmalade is made by Jon - he adds a generous bit of Scotch to the batch. YUM!) and then back to bed. I'm sure I will feel much better after I've had a decent nap. Or two.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's...
Power Port!
The patient discharge packet I was given yesterday shows a photo of my new best friend (sorry any of you who thought you owned that title), Power Port. Imagine a plastic triangular device with a soft middle and you pretty much know what is now happily embedded in my chest. The photo on the discharge packet makes it appear to be some sort of alien life form with two beady eyes and a long white tail! Guess it is somewhat alien, or foreign, to my bod. The device is made by BARD. Wonder if it will do anything to improve my poetic abilities. Yes, I am still very bitter about not winning Jurgen Gothe's limerick contest some years back. He asked listeners of his now defunct CBC Radio program Disc Drive to compose a limerick containing the words canine, eggplant, queezy, extension, and froth. The "winner" was something he literally pulled from a hat and when he read it on air, it made absolutely no sense whatsoever even though Jurgen read it with a Glasgow lilt as per the author's instructions. Did I mention I was bitter? Since I was robbed of my rightful glory, I will now self-publish my far superior submission to the aforementioned competition. (Insert sound of throat clearing here.)
Noel was decidedly queezy
After eggplant saucy and cheesy
The cook failed to mention
The recipe extension
Froth with canine spittle and sneezies
But I digress. Anyone sufficiently interested in the finer details of the Power Port and its wonderous Groshong catheter can look up the bumph on the following URL http://www.powerportadvantage.com/clinicians.html
While I was recovering from the port insertion, I was offered a peanut butter sandwich! Can't believe in this day and age that a hospital is issuing peanut butter sandwiches when it bans the use of perfume, cigarette smoking, and other stuff that is harmful to a wide segment of the population. More unbelievable considering I mentioned my nut allergy when asked for my long list of sensitivities - yeah, I know they meant penicillin, latex, and the like, but for some reason I always mention the nut thing, too. Thank goodness I had my epi pen along for the ride. I opted for the dried out processed cheese slice on gummy brown bread - it was the only other thing available in the cath lab and I hadn't eaten for nearly 16 hours so chocked it down. Yup, I'm still working on getting VCH to change its food supplier, or get the food supplier to supply some actual food to hospital patients. Good thing I can't hold my breath, eh?
Photo of REAL cheese that I made at a workshop at UBC Farm. It's a ricotta with dried bell peppers and garlic. Yum!
As for the MUGA scan, it went very well. Shot of tin, waited for about 1/2 hour, shot of isotope, scan, done. Easy peasy. Sadly, Hershel was off yesterday. Apparently he did a lot of bragging about having a planet named with the same name after our previous meetings.
Spent the night at Donna's as a precaution. Came home today. Am feeling pretty much "normal" now with exception of tenderness around the incision site on my chest. Couldn't be happier as I had arranged to visit Roz and some other friends in the States for the weekend. It's the group of spinners/knitters who usually meet at Vashon Island every March. I couldn't go this year, and also missed St Distaff's Day in Jan, so really wanted to see everyone this time. Looking forward to it.
The patient discharge packet I was given yesterday shows a photo of my new best friend (sorry any of you who thought you owned that title), Power Port. Imagine a plastic triangular device with a soft middle and you pretty much know what is now happily embedded in my chest. The photo on the discharge packet makes it appear to be some sort of alien life form with two beady eyes and a long white tail! Guess it is somewhat alien, or foreign, to my bod. The device is made by BARD. Wonder if it will do anything to improve my poetic abilities. Yes, I am still very bitter about not winning Jurgen Gothe's limerick contest some years back. He asked listeners of his now defunct CBC Radio program Disc Drive to compose a limerick containing the words canine, eggplant, queezy, extension, and froth. The "winner" was something he literally pulled from a hat and when he read it on air, it made absolutely no sense whatsoever even though Jurgen read it with a Glasgow lilt as per the author's instructions. Did I mention I was bitter? Since I was robbed of my rightful glory, I will now self-publish my far superior submission to the aforementioned competition. (Insert sound of throat clearing here.)
Noel was decidedly queezy
After eggplant saucy and cheesy
The cook failed to mention
The recipe extension
Froth with canine spittle and sneezies
But I digress. Anyone sufficiently interested in the finer details of the Power Port and its wonderous Groshong catheter can look up the bumph on the following URL http://www.powerportadvantage.com/clinicians.html
While I was recovering from the port insertion, I was offered a peanut butter sandwich! Can't believe in this day and age that a hospital is issuing peanut butter sandwiches when it bans the use of perfume, cigarette smoking, and other stuff that is harmful to a wide segment of the population. More unbelievable considering I mentioned my nut allergy when asked for my long list of sensitivities - yeah, I know they meant penicillin, latex, and the like, but for some reason I always mention the nut thing, too. Thank goodness I had my epi pen along for the ride. I opted for the dried out processed cheese slice on gummy brown bread - it was the only other thing available in the cath lab and I hadn't eaten for nearly 16 hours so chocked it down. Yup, I'm still working on getting VCH to change its food supplier, or get the food supplier to supply some actual food to hospital patients. Good thing I can't hold my breath, eh?
Photo of REAL cheese that I made at a workshop at UBC Farm. It's a ricotta with dried bell peppers and garlic. Yum!
As for the MUGA scan, it went very well. Shot of tin, waited for about 1/2 hour, shot of isotope, scan, done. Easy peasy. Sadly, Hershel was off yesterday. Apparently he did a lot of bragging about having a planet named with the same name after our previous meetings.
Spent the night at Donna's as a precaution. Came home today. Am feeling pretty much "normal" now with exception of tenderness around the incision site on my chest. Couldn't be happier as I had arranged to visit Roz and some other friends in the States for the weekend. It's the group of spinners/knitters who usually meet at Vashon Island every March. I couldn't go this year, and also missed St Distaff's Day in Jan, so really wanted to see everyone this time. Looking forward to it.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
And so it begins ...
Off to Vancouver tomorrow for the final pre-chemo prep at VGH - stuff that can't be done in Sechelt.
Will have a MUGA scan (enhanced ECG) to establish a baseline before I start on Herceptin, which can be very hard on the heart. The scan is a painless procedure that requires an initial injection of tin. The tin is left to float about my blood system for the better part of an hour. I then return to the nuclear medicine dept for an injection of a radioisotope - the radioisotope will attach itself to the tin, making it easier to "read" my heart function during the scan.
Prior to this, I will have a port-a-cath embedded into my chest. In case you're wondering, the port is a disc-shaped object that, once embedded, looks similar to a pacemaker. Friends in the know tell me the embedding procedure is similar to that of a pacemaker as well. The port will make it easier for the nursing staff at St Mary's to obtain the necessary weekly blood samples and to administer the weekly chemo treatments as most veins in my usable arm have pretty much co-operating after the last round of chemo.
I've had both of these procedures before, during the previous bout of cancer, so know what to expect. Simple stuff really. No big whoop.
In addition to all the aforementioned hospital jazz, there is a plan to get my hairs cut. I know one of the chemo drugs I'm scheduled to take will not prompt any hair loss (at least it didn't when I took it a year ago), but am not sure about the second drug. Since the mop is starting to resemble a mullet, the cut is long overdue. In any case, I don't want to wait until it's time to visit this salon - one I spied while in Derry (formerly Londonderry), Northern Ireland.
Will have a MUGA scan (enhanced ECG) to establish a baseline before I start on Herceptin, which can be very hard on the heart. The scan is a painless procedure that requires an initial injection of tin. The tin is left to float about my blood system for the better part of an hour. I then return to the nuclear medicine dept for an injection of a radioisotope - the radioisotope will attach itself to the tin, making it easier to "read" my heart function during the scan.
Prior to this, I will have a port-a-cath embedded into my chest. In case you're wondering, the port is a disc-shaped object that, once embedded, looks similar to a pacemaker. Friends in the know tell me the embedding procedure is similar to that of a pacemaker as well. The port will make it easier for the nursing staff at St Mary's to obtain the necessary weekly blood samples and to administer the weekly chemo treatments as most veins in my usable arm have pretty much co-operating after the last round of chemo.
I've had both of these procedures before, during the previous bout of cancer, so know what to expect. Simple stuff really. No big whoop.
In addition to all the aforementioned hospital jazz, there is a plan to get my hairs cut. I know one of the chemo drugs I'm scheduled to take will not prompt any hair loss (at least it didn't when I took it a year ago), but am not sure about the second drug. Since the mop is starting to resemble a mullet, the cut is long overdue. In any case, I don't want to wait until it's time to visit this salon - one I spied while in Derry (formerly Londonderry), Northern Ireland.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Hoppy Easter
Had a wonderful Easter weekend. Family (plus Donna) gathered at Penny and Jon's for a delightful feast. Whiskers, the chocolate bunny, didn't last long and I soon regretted it - some tummy upset. Otherwise, a very pleasant time. Until I started to laugh and my throat went into spasm. After a minute or so of hard coughing, I caught my breath once more, however, I continued to cough throughout the night and following morning. Since life without laughter is hardly work the effort, it is a small price to pay.
Today, Easter Monday, will be a lazy day. Only just up but already feel like a nap. If ambition strikes and the weather holds, I may venture outside and clean up a bit after Friday night's wicked storm. Lots of branches down, potted plants tipped over, debris everywhere. The road to Mom's looked like a path in the woods on Sat am! Heard two cars were hit by trees on the Stanley Park causeway, so really can't complain. The power of Mother Nature never ceases to amaze.
Today, Easter Monday, will be a lazy day. Only just up but already feel like a nap. If ambition strikes and the weather holds, I may venture outside and clean up a bit after Friday night's wicked storm. Lots of branches down, potted plants tipped over, debris everywhere. The road to Mom's looked like a path in the woods on Sat am! Heard two cars were hit by trees on the Stanley Park causeway, so really can't complain. The power of Mother Nature never ceases to amaze.
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